I was in my early thirties, living an ordinary life in a European city. I used to work as a
graphic designer, surrounded by a mix of modernity and history in my hometown. Despite
my professional success, I felt an emptiness in my heart. I was searching for something
deeper, more meaningful than the routine of work and social meetings with my friends.
During an autumn evening, while I was in an old bookstore, I stumbled over a book called
‘The heart of Islam’. I was intrigued thinking about the differences between the perceptions
of the faith I’ve grown up with and the compassion I’ve seen in that text, so I decided to
buy and read it. The words lit up a fire inside me, I felt some kind of curiosity. As I was
discovering the teachings of Islam, I was also finding a sense of peace and purpose.
After reading that book, I spent months studying more about Islam. I started to attend
lectures, engaged in online talks about the faith and started to understand more and more
from those who practiced Islam. The more I learnt, the more my heart opened. I was
attracted to the concepts of community, compassion and humility. The Muslim teachings
encourage gratitude and kindness. These were the ideas that brought me peace.
Eventually, I made a decision. I wanted to become a revert. With the guidance of a local
imam, I embraced Islam and received my Arabic name, Layla. On the biggest day of my
life, I was surrounded by a small group of my new Muslim friends I found in the community.
I felt so much warmth in my heart.
In my new faith, I felt a strong calling to deepen in the teachings of Islam. I wanted to move
in a country in which everyone lived their lives with kindness, compassion and sense of
community. And so, I did. The change was difficult. I had to say goodbye to my old friends
and family because I was going with my Muslim husband to his country. Although they all
were supportive, they were also a bit skeptical and concerned.
Arriving in my new city, I was captivated by its beauty – its stunning mosques, energetic
bazaars and harmony at the same time. People welcomed me with open arms, they were
curious about the way I have found Islam and delighted to listen to my story. I quickly
started to learn the language, connected with local sisters and found the sense of
belonging.
As I settled into my new life, I’ve found ways to contribute to my community. I volunteered
at a local center which provided support for women and children in need. My artistic skills
allowed me to teach children about art, encouraging them to become more creative and
encourage the women at the same time.
In the evenings I would often draw while reflecting on my journey. Of course, it wasn’t
perfect at first. I faced a series of challenges such as cultural adjustments, language
barriers and maybe some moments of doubt too. But each time I perceived those
challenges as tests that Allah subahanahu wa taala gave me to test my faith, to prove that
I’m worthy of Him. I found peace in prayers and cherished every moment of my life.
Years passed. I built friendships that felt like family, shared stories at the iftar table during
Ramadan and celebrated with laughter and love. During this wonderful journey, I also
found another kind of love, the one of my husband’s.
As time passed by, I watched my kids grow up, thinking about how far I’ve come from being
a European woman trying to find peace to a happy wife and mother. I learnt that faith isn’t
just a set of beliefs but also a way of understanding, respect, and love. I found purpose.
As I stood on the balcony of my modest home, watching the minarets in front of the setting
sun, I felt at home. I rediscovered myself, I was meant to be there.
Layla
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